I type considerably slower than yesterday. I read my emails thoroughly. When I print something, I take the time to go get it from the printer. When my phone rings, I’m not closing my eyes and wishing it will stop. I peel and eat the orange that’s been sitting on my desk since Monday. I have several documents open. I work a little in one, a little in another. All in all I’m taking my time. I’m allowing myself to skip the running around being breathless.
I’m tired. I didn’t sleep well last night. I woke up a couple of times worried that the projects I handed over to other people yesterday weren’t properly done. I kept wondering whether my instructions were good enough. I also woke up a couple of times to pee – the heavy rain outside the windows working its magic like a dripping tap.
I leave work early. I do only what is required of me. I leave my desk messy and chaotic – my coffee cup still half full.
As I get on my bike and begin pedalling, it starts to rain. Slowly at first, but pouring within minutes. The legs of my trousers are wet, I’m cold. I pedal harder and just want to get home as quickly as possible. I run up the stairs. I take of my wet clothes in seconds – I’m like a child finally arriving at the beach on a hot summer day and wanting nothing more than to get out of the clothes and dive in as soon as possible.
Dressed in something warm, I make a cup of tea. I slow down again. I close my eyes and enjoy how absolutely nothing goes through my mind. Tomorrow is the last day of work before Easter. I can almost touch my 10 days off. And I actually think I deserve them.